chapter 9 School run mum

As Grant walks through the door, I greet him with a massive smile.

“Look at what I found today!”

I lead him over to the computer, where I already have the list waiting. The kids are not long from going to bed, they are all in the TV room, just finishing a movie. I sit down gently next to him, a wait to hear his response!

“Why am I looking at this?”

“Well I was thinking that we’ve been in this house for almost five years, I’ve outgrown it! I feel I need to move on, I love this house and all, but that feeling is in me that we need to move!”

I wait on tenterhooks, trying to read his eyes!! Would help if he opened them! His mouth is opening, he’s going to say something, he’s coming closer…. What’s he doing??

He plants a big kiss on my lips, smiles and says

“I don’t think so”

WHAT!!!  I’ve got the feeling though, does he not realise this! The feeling that starts in my toes, and then gradually works it way up, till my fingers are twitching, and the only way I can get them to stop, is to tap out the words Rightmove on the keyboard!! ARGH……7 against 1 are not good odds! Mmm, I need to rethink my strategy. I need to become tactical, I need to think about it logically, I need to get a drink, I’m so thirsty!

I stand next to the sink with a tall glass of water and then call to Grant

“Why?”

“Because it’s not a good time, money, schools, we have other things to pay out for; do you want me to carry on?”

“No!”

The wheels in my head are turning,

“It’ll be nearer your work, so less travel and petrol!!”

“That’s true, but weighed up overall, not enough to swing it”

This doesn’t look like its going to happen. I come to the depressing conclusion that I’ll let it rest for a little while, but will keep my eye on the market, I’m not exactly packing boxes, or phoning removal companies…… might be an idea to get a quote though!!

I wander back in and announce the bedtime routine will now begin…. Starting with the nightly brushing of the teeth.

“Can we just…”

“No, teeth, now!”

All six slowly rise from their places on the sofas, and walk round shouldered towards the stairs, Imogen is just copying them and looks hilarious, her shoulders are up by her ears! I turn to Grant who has made himself comfy on the sofa and say

“Are we going halves or just me?”

Translated for the Non-Watling it means….. Are we going to take three each and put them to bed or am I doing it all by myself tonight? He decides we’re going halves; I give him the boys and Imogen, haha, that’ll serve him right for not moving. We crawl up the stairs, start the bedtime palaver, and almost slide down the stairs again once finished. Why does it take them seconds to wake up, jump out of bed and come downstairs in the morning, but a lifetime to go to bed?? I don’t get it. I decide one day to make a study of it, but for now I’ve just got the wonder team into bed and there’s no way I have the strength to even pick up a remote let alone become a scientist for the night! We both walk through the door at once and get stuck, or did Grant just want to be close?......No, his on the sofa already!!

We sit there, eyes glued to the Television, both still, apart from when the credits roll up and we both become ninjas to see who will get the remote first! Grant looks at me and asks

“Do you want a Hot Chocolate?”

“Oooo yes please” I reply

“Can you get me one aswell then please?”

I only do it because I want a Hot chocolate and biscuits! Wonder how long I’ll be doing this for in this house?

Chapter 8 School run mum

I get itchy feet!! Not literally, but I tend to get bored of living in our houses! So we’ve moved a lot! An expensive hobby, but Grant indulges me. I think this is house number 9 for us! We’ve been married for 13 years and I think it works out a house every year or two. I think that Irish blood that runs through my veins pulls me on, much to my kid’s annoyance.

“You are going to love this house, come and look at it with Daddy and I, You’ll still be in the same school!”

“Where is it?”

“Not sure, let me get the map”

“Do we have to, I like this garden”

“Yeah, and I like my room!”

“Well this one has a bigger garden, and I’ll do you a cool new room!”

These were our general conversations before we moved, and then the house hunting began!! I’m so nosey, I just looking around houses! Haha. But I tend to fall in love with quite a few! I’ll be an eternal interior designer. I think that’s why I get bored, oh no, am I now going to have counselling sessions probing into why I feel the need to move every 6 months??

“Yes Mrs Watling, you see, I think this excessive house moving all stems from the time when you were walking home from school and saw that house, which meant you were not satisfied with your house or as it wasn’t yours, we’ll say your bedroom, this I believe stems from your wants for the material things in life which stems from making your surroundings nice and pleasing, which I think gives you security, therefore gives you comfort, because I give it to you that you are afraid of the dark!!”

It always comes down to people being afraid of the dark!

No I’m afraid of the dark because I’ve watched to many movies!! So, after my self diagnosis, I realise I have that itchy feeling! The wind of time are a changing. Just like the movie Choclat, except that I don’t move house when a bit of wind blows, I don’t own a cloak and I’m not really thinking of moving to a tranquil little town in France! So actually nothing like Chocolat!! I give a quick check to the Lasagne, and go to the computer. Ahhh, kids doing homework!! Rubbish, when did they become so studious!

I search the house for a paper and realise I have recycled it! Check me, recycled it! Mother earth!! I decide to sit down and think over my rashness. Do I really want to move? Do I really want to move from this lovely 6 bed house, with it’s big back garden, it’s close to the station, a minutes walk to the town, friends we’ve had for years, and the best chinese place I’ve ever had!! Do I really want to move? Do I really want to move? For some strange, unknown reason, I actually really do, now how do I break this to Grant, and the kids.

“Kids, do you fancy moving?”

“NO!”

Mmmm, didn’t go to well! Maybe I should have gone in with a plate of cookies! That’s where my plan went wrong. Oh why am I so rash, I need to start at the beginning of my plans and not jump straight to the finale!

Step one – Bake cookies, ah man, all I’ve got is a Lasagne and some garlic bread, wonder if that will get me anywhere? I finish the dinner and call the hoards in to devour the food that I have just placed on the table. I hear what sounds like hundreds of feet pounding on the floor and get ready for the grand entrance of six hungry kids! It never ceases to amaze me what a big group they look like when they are all together. My little army marching together to conquer the Kitchen!

They descend on the table and all make a grab for the spoon that’s placed by the side of the Lasagne. With my catlike reflexes, I pick it up before anyone else. I reign supreme, and am more importantly in control of portion sizes. I dish out, and take a seat at the end of the table.

“So…..” now’s not the time

“So, how’s all your days been?” I’m sure I have some cookies in the cupboard, later Keely, bide your time!

“I climbed to the top of the rope in PE today, I touched the ceiling”

“Good job, Elliot, how did you get down?”

“I slid and now I have burnt hands!”

I thought this would have been a subject to raise when he first saw me at school, Burnt hands!, I’d be telling anyone who’d listen, and probably waving them about in the cool air. Or is that just me. As I quiz my hard nut son a little more, Sienna pipes up with

“ I love Garlic bread”

“That’s great darling, so are you ok now Elliot?”

“Yep”

“Mum, can we have Garlic bread everyday, I love it?”

“No, it doesn’t go with every single meal Sienna, normally Italian meals, pizza, bolog….”

“Are we Italian?”

“No!”

“Why do we eat Italian food all the time then?”

“We don’t!”

Then I think back to the last two weeks dinners, rubbish, she’s right! Note to self, read entire cookbook shelf! I ease away from the table, and slowly and quietly pull a packet of cookies out of the cupboard. My secret weapon! I arrange them nicely on the plate, and once the last scraps of dinner have been licked of the plates, I place the plate on the table, and get down to business.

“I was thinking of moving, what do you think?”

“We said no earlier! Did you not hear us?”

“Yes, but I’m treating you like adults and opening up a discussion about it” Nice touch I think!

We sit and talk pros and cons for about 10 minutes, and then they are bored. But we have come to an answer. A resounding NO!!  What a waste of a pack of cookies, what will I have with my hot chocolate tonight now? I call back the troops, and point to the chores chart. Groans ring in my ears, so I escape the noise and leave them to it. All they have to do is load a dishwasher!! I notice the computer is free and open up a new tab quickly before the kids come back. Type in Rightmove and see what comes up.

“What area do we move to?”

“What?”

“Nothing, talking to myself, not the kitchen staff!!” Didn’t realise I had said that out loud!

The world is my oyster, I can pick anywhere, Peru, Iceland, China, I type in 10 miles from Benfleet!! I like to live dangerously! Thousands of houses come up on a never ending list, I decide to refine it. I type in a price, number of bedrooms, and press find properties. That’s better, a more manageable list. I trawl through the long line of houses, putting far too many into my favourites to show Grant when he gets home.  More cookies are needed I think!!!

Just Wondering!

I'm just sat here with Imogen, my Tinkerbell of a two year old, and we're watching Fireman Sam. Nothing wrong with that I hear you say. No, I agree, I'm quite enjoying the snuggles, but as I sit here and watch a small village in wales, have at least three fires a day, I ask myself, has no one called the Police to report a suspected Arsonist???  Also, Norman!!! This child is left to wander the streets, while his Mum polishes the sweet rack. Not only that, but he is the main cause of the fires. Surely people are putting two and two together, and thinking he needs a room and Juvenile hall!!  ha ha

What am I letting my children watch!!! Imogen.... put those matches down!

Mummas Leek and Potato Soup

3 big potato's 3-4 big Leeks
1 large Onion
3-4 Chicken oxo cubes
2 pints of water
salt and pepper

Peel potato's and cube into 1-2 inches

Bring to boil in a pan

Fry onions and leeks in a little oil

Add them to the potato's

Add oxo cubes, and salt and pepper

Continue to boil till potatoes are cooked

Put half of the mix into a blender and blend, repeat with other half

Delicious!! Enjoy x

No going back Onion Gravy

Found this in a reciepe book, and will never have any other onion gravy again!!

2 tbsp Olive oil
2 tbsp Butter
8 Onions -Sliced
1 tsp Caster sugar
1 tbsp Plain flour (all purpose)
1/2 pint beef stock

Heat Oil and butter in a large pan

Add Onions and mix well to coat

Cover and cook gently for about 30 mins, stirring frequently

Add sugar and cook for another 5 mins or until soft

Remove pan from the heat and stir in flour

Gradually stir in stock

Return to heat and bring to boil, continue to stir, then simmer for 3 minutes

Season to taste

Mmmmmm enjoy x

Best Meatloaf ever!!!

Sautee - 2 large onions (diced)
              pinch of salt
              pinch of pepper
              tsp of fresh chopped Thyme

Add - 3 tbs Worster sauce
          1/3 cup chicken stock
           1 tbsp tomato paste

Take off heat

In a seperate bowl mix - 1/2 cup bread crumbs
                                      2 eggs (beaten lightly)

Add this to - 2 1/2 lbs mince meat

Add pan ingredients in to the mince and mix with a fork

Take a handful of the mixture and shape into an rectangle shape

Place on the tray, repeat this till mixture is gone

Spread tomato ketchup on top of the meatloaves

Bake in the oven for 40-45 minutes, on 180/350

Remove and eat straight away, I serve with a yummy mash potato!!
Enjoy x

Chapter 7 of School Run Mum

I run to the kitchen quickly, pretending I didn’t hear, I don’t really do moaning kids, never have, probably never will. That one, I’ll put on hold till they get bored of shouting Mum! I reach out and push the on button on top of the stereo.

“She’s so lovely, she’s so lovely, she’s so lovely, she’s so loverrrrly!” come my dulcet tones from the kitchen. Well, dulcet might not be the word that others may want to use, let’s go with Tina Turner wannabe. Oh to try and keep rooted to the spot when all I want to do is let loose and dance is hard, so I’ve decided to go with it. I’m flying around the kitchen like that scene in Flashdance!

 I love this song at the moment. Scouting for Girls… She’s so lovely. I’m the kind of person whose life has a soundtrack. I was bought up on music, all kinds, Motown, classic, pop, country, R&B, the list goes on. As I’ve grown up music has played a massive part of my life. Even now, I’ll start gagging when certain songs come on that were always being played when I had morning sickness! Not good when you’re in a serious conversation with someone.

Why is it that when you’re a Mum, there’s a certain part in your brain that says,

“Even though you’ve had six kids, you can still dance the way you did and still look cool!”

Well, I can tell you now, half of that did not wobble when I was 18! I have to wait for the jiggling to stop before I return to walking, for fear of losing balance and falling over. People say the miracle of child birth is amazing…. I think it’s a miracle if you can keep your body in some sort of shape that resembles a human and not the marshmallow man! I love my kids more than anything; I love them so much that I have a stretch mark for each. A mothers love!

So dancing around the kitchen, Elliot pops his head in and asks:

“What’s for…..What are you doing?”

“Dancing!”

“Why?”

“Because you happen to have the coolest Mummy in the world who not only dances cool, but I can do this….. Owwww!”

“You alright?”

“Lasagne… with a side of garlic bread!”

“Cool – oh and Mum, I wouldn’t do that again!”

Cheeky, I use to do the splits all the time!!

I turn the music down a little and begin to wander around the kitchen; I walk three steps and sit down at the table, and put the TV on. Ahhh…. Midsommer Murders. I love this programme. How does Detective Barnaby solve all these crimes in this little village? By the looks of it, only 15 people live there, they should all have been dead by the end of season one!! Must have had move ins. Or, it could be him killing everyone, what a twist that would be. I kick my shoes off in various directions, and reach out to turn the music down, WHOOSH. A little person on a scooter whizzes past me!

“How many times…. I keep telling you, outside, the scooters are to stay outside, they are at no time allowed in the house!”

A munchkin that took the wrong turn on the yellow brick road replies

“Sorr-wee!”

As Imogen shouts this out, she continues her reign of scooter terror in the living room; I walk with purpose out of the kitchen, stand by the patio doors and point to the garden! Without even stopping, she whizzes past me again, and out of the patio doors. 2-year-olds nowadays. After reaching the bottom of the garden in record time, she is now flying high above the little trees on the trampoline! My kind of girl, living life to the full!

I stand and watch my little bundle of fun bouncing up and down, then round down the garden and leap on to the trampoline, Imogen flies higher than I have ever seen her go, and people on the street stop to look at the amazing flying toddler that keeps appearing over the fence every 4 seconds! I hold my breath to make sure she actually lands back on the Trampoline, and breath a huge sigh of relief when she does. She commands me to jump with her, I warily get up and start to do little jumps

“Higher”

“No, Mummy will do little jumps, or you’ll be flying with the birds again!”

“I like it!”

“No, I’ll jump little”

“Peeeees”

I start to jump a little higher, and higher still, I jump a couple more times then realise that childbirth has been very cruel to my bladder!!! I make my excuses to a 2 year old, and dash off up the garden.

Detective Barnaby is slowly but surely, drawing all sorts of conclusions as to who murdered the Art dealer, and the son of the Butcher, who was engaged to the daughter of the Art dealer, but the young man from the Yacht Club who has been in love with her for years, was not happy about this at all, and his movements seem to suggest him as the culprit! I have my own suspicions. I am going with Col Mustard, in the Library, with the revolver!! 

I settle down on the chair again, and realise the whole point of being in the Kitchen is to start the dinner. I open the Fridge and browse it’s contents, Wow, I need to go shopping. I notice someone has hidden mini Mars bar behind a tin of Beans. Got to have eyes like a Hawk when you’re a Mum. I reluctantly leave it there and spy the mincemeat. I grab it, and shut the door.

“Whose Mini Mars bar is that in the fridge?”

Gabe comes speeding through from the TV room and smoothly leaps onto the side and opens the fridge, eyes darting back and forth, he finds the stash of chocolate gold, and just as quick runs back out!

I might be jumping to conclusions, but I think it was his! I turn back to my meat and bend down to find our frying pan. I must remember to clear and tidy this cupboard out. I don’t know if you are the same, but my pots and pan cupboard, gets messed up every night, so I have now given up, and have it as a free for all. This actually really bugs me, as I am the kind of person that lives by the saying:

“A place for everything and everything in its place”

I eventually recover the frying pan from Narnia and place it on the hobs, put the meat in, and stir. I’m not Nigella, I don’t have the ability to make cooking dinner sound romantic and exciting. I think the kids would think I had gone mad, if I started narrating everything I was doing in the kitchen!

DING DONG

This time I’m fully at ease with that sound, I’m dressed!! I just shout out to the boys

“Half an hour!”

“OK”

I busy myself around the kitchen while the meat is cooking, and by busy I really mean, throw a few things in the dishwasher and sit down to watch the rest of Midsommer Murders!

That’s when I think ………My life is so Mundane and repetitive, I need more, more excitement!”

Spoke too soon!!

Just made a really nice and easy sauce to accompany Pork!

Wholegrain mustard sauce

Made on the Hobs

1/2 cup butter
1 cup plain flour
3/4 pint of semi skimmed milk
pinch salt
pinch pepper
1 1/2 tsp wholegrain mustard

Method

melt butter in pan
add flour and whisk quickly
add milk 1/4 pint at a time
add salt and pepper
add mustard

whisk till no lumps, and pour over Pork

Enjoy x

As I stroll around the shops, I am wondering to myself how long I can live with sleep deprivation? I've gone 4 days now! I'm being a tad dramatic, I've had a couple hours sleep for the past four nought. It all began with a headache, progressed to the River Thames flowing from my nose, onto Niagara Falls, weakness and fuzzy head, then this cough, that I seriously am getting fed up with! It gets worse at night, so i come downstairs to prevent waking the rest of the household sleeping like babies! I sit on the sofa, eyelids taking over both my cheeks, I'm that tired, I'm flopping all over the place to try and stay upright, and after writing my will, and doing the washing up, I decide to prop myself up on the sofa with a million cushions. I grab a couple of Throws and begin to build the tower of cushions around me. All the while trying not to cough, knowing if I do, I'll never stop, and what a total waste of time building this architectural masterpiece that would be! I position myself in the midst of what has now become a well. Let the covers fall on top of  me, and and let my head fall back, as my neck has now lost the will to support it. I have the biggest glass in the house next to me, full of water, and I let the tiredness take over. Last numbers I looked at on my phone read 5:58!!

8:33am!!! Yes, that's when when I was awoken by Chloe saying she only had 10p of credit left on her phone!!! I leave the house at 8:40 to begin the school run, time for me to spin around very quickly and turn into Wonderwoman. Nah, not going to happen today. I text my friend, Gabe normally walks to school with her son, and meets him at 8:30..... he was sick everywhere last night too.... didn't tell you that, did I!

"Gabe not going into today, sick last night, sorry, just woke up!"  I press send a tad embarrassed!

Surf look today, I think. little thought required. I throw my clothes on, and yell down the stairs for the rest of the kids to get their shoes on  and make their way to the car. I don't hear anyone move, and decide the only way to get them out is to say I'll sell the TV!! Task done, no kids left in the house. I grab my bag and phone, and head out of the door, SUNNIES!!! It's way to bright for the way I feel today! I lean back in the doorway and grab them out of the basket. Ahhhhh.... I may just make it to 9 o' clock!

3 times it takes to start my car, I'm cursed when it comes to cars. I think it is to keep me humble! We set off, I sometimes am amzed at myself, how I can completely be so unawares of what is going on in the car! I am bought back to the present by Sienna saying

"Tell Elliot to stop it...... Mum!.... Tell him!"

I Reply

"Elliot!"

Phew, she's happy with that. I park the car and four kids and a zombie all pile out of the car. I grab hands and cross the road. I say goodbye to 2 on the way to Pre school, and hand Imogen over to the pre school leaders quite happily. I call Gabes school to let them know of the ordeal that was last night, and that he wouldn't be in. Leave a message, leave a message!! I wanted some sympathy!! I leave a message!. Two secs later I get a call from the school....They were by the phone! They must have been! I had to leave a message! They need Gabe in, it's SATS week. I do as I'm told, then go of to town!

That's where I started wondering, How long can I live with sleep deprivation?

Chapter 6 of School Run Mum

Chapter 6 of School Run Mum

I grab a towel, and wrap it round me, and walk out of the en-suite. I get a sudden pang of modesty, and look around the whole upper floor of my house for my dressing gown. I find it laid out crease free on Sienna's bed, she's obviously used it as a cover last night! I grab it.

DING DONG

Oh my goodness, what is so important that this person after two rings of my doorbell has not given up? I throw the dressing gown on me and almost trip head first down the stairs, I check myself in the mirror as I walk to the door, just to make sure I am not sporting the runny mascara look, managed to avoid it, due to only being in the shower for 20 seconds!!

I open the door and am about to say Hello, when I stop in my tracks and almost scream..... No-ones there!! I almost want to run down the road and find this person, and demand they tell me what was so urgent that they Ding Dong three times, and THEN walk off! I shut the door and run back up to the shower, I left it running so it's still a lovely temperature. I jump back in and the phone goes..... They can leave a message!

Once clean and smelling sweet, I emerge from the Sauna that is my En-suite, and fall backwards onto my bed. I lay there for a minute, thinking
"I’ve got an hour and a half till the kids get out!"

My eyes open at 3pm!! The kids get out of school in 15 minutes, I am still laying on the bed, in my dressing gown, with Imogen curled up next to me. What the heck! I sit up so fast I feel dizzy. I grab my phone and text Tan and tell her what's happened.
"Can you grab Sienna when she gets out if I'm not there pleasey?"
"Sure honey :)" comes back the reassuring text. Phew.
I grab my jogging suit, put it on in record time, a pair of flip flops that are laying around, are slid onto my feet in seconds, and I grab a baseball cap, as going to sleep with wet hair, doesn't always turn out to be the best way to style it!! Why can't I find these things out when I've got more time. I scoop Imogen up into my arms, pick up her coat on the way out the door, only just catching it, to run back into the house to get my keys. I strap Imogen in, her head nodding everywhere the entire time, and jump into the car......
"PLEASE START, of all the times I need you to start first time, this would be it, PLEASE!"
I turn the key in the ignition, and the engine fires up with an almighty roar! I don't have time for a celebratory dance, so I chuck it into reverse and am on my way! I park on the curb, not really the place to park, I know, but Sienna always looks so disappointed in me if I'm late, that I've made it my mission in life to always be on time. I can't take the big puppy dog eyes, that seem to be asking me
"Why, Why did you leave me here, when all the other Mummies took their children at the right time?"

I literally throw Imogen over my shoulder, and run down the path to Sienna's classroom door! Tan calls out
"Just in time my love, the doors just opening"
I manage to escape the look, to live another day. I apologise for the way I look, and notice Sienna's smiley little face emerge from the classroom! I wave and relax. She's none the wiser, I am still a good mummy, and on the plus side, I am totally on time to pick the boys and Chloe up. The afternoon chat is in full swing when I arrive. I fill the girls in on my laziness and stand back to listen to the playground buzz. I love it, there's a certain feeling about the playground, it's like this safe enclosure. It's a little area of town, where gossip is shared, lunch dates are made, and kids are swapped for play dates, to be returned home later. As soon as you walk out of the gates, things change. You become 'Mum' again. As I wait for the boys and Chloe to join us in the Infants playground, I chat, I make two Lunch dates and I manage to get a cupcake order. Did I mention I make cupcakes? It's a way of making money, and the kids love it, as I always make a few extra!

I hear the boys before I see them, Imogen and Sienna have run off to play on the Trim Trail, and the boys have just thrown their bags to join Sienna's at my feet. Chloe wanders round with her friends, and chats with them.... a school run mum in training! I shout out they have five minutes, I know it will be more like ten to fifteen, as I will get talking! It tends to be my little group of mums that are always the last out of the playground. I keep to my word tonight, and am only five minutes. The kids run off towards the gate before my voice seems to throw an invisible rope around them all and pulls them back to me.
"Bags!"
They each grab their bags, and head at a snails pace now up to the gate. I say my farewells, and quickly walk up to the gate. Here I start chatting with another mum, so the kids, huddle while I laugh and words like...Really?....No!....You're kidding fall out of my mouth. The kids start bouncing about and try to catch my eye. I say goodbye, and head towards my car. I hadn't locked it, so the kids are already in there by the time I arrive. I clip Imogen in, and as I put one leg in the car, I hear someone call my name. It's Deb! The kids give a collective groan, we always talk for ages. I decide to ignore their chorus, and bring my leg back out, and give Deb a hug.
We talked for ages! I get back in the car, and the kids say in unison
"Can we go home NOW?"
"Yes, I wasn't that long!"
 The silent look on the back seat, let’s me know I was.

We head home, the car deciding that today, is a good day. I wave all the way home, even to Lisa in Tickled Pink. As we pull up to the drive, the clicks of the seat belts ring in my ears. As soon as we stop the kids are flying out of the car and are hopping up and down on the front doorstep to get in! I grab Imogen, and walk as slowly as I can... hehe....
"Hurry Up, I need the toilet!"
Oh, I quicken my step; I don't want any more washing today. They all pile in and dash to the toilets. We have three, and they seem to always be in use. How's that? I stand in the living room and say to myself
"Let the fun begin!"

"MUM!"

Here we go!

Chapter 5 of School Run Mum

Chapter 5

“Seriously, I’m at a roundabout! Not now, Not now! Stupid car…. Not really, I love you, I love you, please work!”

This is my normal pep talk to the car when it feels like giving up and laying its weary wheels down to rest. I was told that my car normally gives up after about five years….. Almost eight years later, new wheels, 2 new batteries, a big hole in the water bottle, and bringing back to life countless times, it’s still with us…..no doubt grudgingly, but non the less, with us! My gratitude towards the car varies depending on it’s performance. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions driving my car. Upon first entering the family taxi, I am filled with hope, faith and anxiety, then pure elation if it starts, or pure ARGH if it doesn’t. Anyone that has taken a lovely car ride, with the music on, windows down, and the car responding to the tiny wish you have will know that feeling of contentment. Well, that’s the complete opposite to the journey you get in my car. As soon as we pull out of the drive, the adrenalin is pumping,

“Will I make it today?”

“Have I got my phone to call Grant to come pick me up from where ever the car has decided the journey has now ended?”

“Did I put the buggy in, I don’t really want to carry Imogen all the way home!”

“Is there water in it?”

“Is there oil in it?”

“Is there life in it?”

All good questions, for a car like mine. Bless it, it gets us round, but only on it’s own terms.  Once it decided to give up just outside a Petrol station. Wouldn’t even give me just a little more to get it into the station! I parked it on the side of the road, got out and kicked the wheel! Like that would make it work, but I felt a whole lot better. That afternoon, once I had bought a can of petrol and refilled a completely empty tank (opps) I was talking to my neighbour, who casually asked, did I get the car working? I looked at her a little puzzled how she new.

“Oh, I drove past while you were giving it a good kicking!”

Number 1 - why didn’t she stop to help??

Number 2 - how totally embarrassing!!

So, as I’m approaching the roundabout, the car is approaching either a heart attack or a strop!! Either one is not going to go down to well with the other drivers behind me. I decide to just close my eyes and put my foot down. Let me just back up there, I didn’t actually close my eyes. That would not adhere to the Laws of the road! So with my eyes wide open, I see a space and almost put my foot through the floor.

“Woaaaah!” Imogen’s thrill seeking side comes out in her.

“Yeaaaah” She loves going round a roundabout, especially at 40 miles an hour I’ve just found out. I’m laughing at her so much, I almost miss our exit. A quick glance, a flick of the indicator, and look over my shoulder and I pull over just in time!! I can hear the crowds cheering in my head. I’m totally trying out for the Grand Prix next year. Lewis Hamilton will be crying in his little pit stop.

As I take my foot off the break, and rest it back down on the floor, I feel an odd shape under my foot, as I search for what it is, I notice that whilst performing my Formula one crowd pleaser, an array of rubbish was flung from under my chair. Ewww, I have actually put my foot on a half eaten banana! Right, family council when the kids get home.

As I praise the car for making it round the massive hill in the middle of the road, I realise it’s not finished yet. I notice from the gauge it is starting to overheat, I only filled it up last night! My Car is a Lush!! I coach it all the way home, and as I pull into the drive, I sit there and let the thumping in my heart calm down. This can’t be good for my nerves. As I sit there a little voice drifts over my shoulder

“Get out Mumma?”

My little passenger has a big smile on her face when I turn around

“Was that fun?”

“Round again!”

No! Definitely not, we’re home, the car made it, I don’t have to phone Grant to tell him where I’ve left the car, and Dora the Explorer is on, which means I get an hour, to do the rest of the chores, without having a constant shadow!

I flop out of the car, and open the car door to get Imogen out. She always has a smile on her face! She puts her hands to me and I wave.

“No, out!”

I knew what she meant, just teasing. My goodness, I’m bad.

I get her out of the car, and pull her up to my eye level.

“How much do I love you?”

“ To a moon and back!”

This is my thing I have with the kids. I think every parent should have their own little thing. Mine is to ask

“How much do I love you?”

the kids reply

“To the moon and back!”

I love it. As I say prayers with them at night, I kiss them and say it. The boys will always say it again when I reach the top of the stairs! Ahhh. It’s melts my heart. I know I’m on limited time with that one, so I enjoy every second.

We walk up the stairs to the house and open the door.

“DORA!”

We walk into the TV room and I place Imogen back into the castle she had built before we left. Command Dora to come on with the magic of the remote control, and leave her to complete the tasks for the day. I think they have to help Isa find her home. The things a 5 year old kid goes through just to help her friends. Through the dark forest, across the river in a boat, try to pass the grumpy troll. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for kids doing things for themselves, but I am a tad concerned that Dora’s parents let her wander through forests, fields, and mountains, on her own, and without packing her a lunch!! Am I the only one seeing something wrong with this picture?

I leave Dora and Imogen to wander through forests, fields and mountains ( if Dora’s parents can do it, then so can I!!” )

Right, 2 hours before this house becomes a hive of activity again. What to do? I end up in the study, browsing the DVDs! I’ll have a shower, then pop a movie on while I do some paperwork. Perfect. My fingers flow over the plastic covers and finally stop at The Notebook! I love this film. I love Noah.

I peep round the corner of the TV room, and check that Imogen is accomplishing her to do list with Dora. All fine and dandy. I was informed that Swiper had in fact turned up, but he’s been dealt with. 2 years old and dealing with thieving foxes already, couldn’t be more proud.

I stand at the bottom of the stairs, look upwards, and put the first foot forward on the 16 step journey that will take me to my bedroom.

“16, divided by two, is 8, that’s only eight steps to my bedroom, I’m doing it!”

I run up the stairs two at a time, and actually surprise myself when I don’t fall back down at the top. I must still have adrenalin racing through my body from the car journey!!

I walk into my bedroom, and throw the DVD on my bed, then make my way to the en-suite. I put the shower on before I get in, to get it to the perfect temperature. I don’t want to put myself through the torture, of being pelted with freezing cold water, then scolding hot. Not really my idea of fun. The redness that had covered my face during Spin class, has finally started to fade away, and I just have that healthy glow. Haha. Healthy glow. Whatever, I was close to throwing up. I’m not sure that if you looked Healthy up in the dictionary, that you would find ‘Being sick’ in big, bold letters written underneath!!. I might be wrong, but I’m willing to put myself out there! Once I see the steam gently rising from the shower, I slid in and let it rain down on me. Nothing like a shower after the gym.

DING DONG!!

If I stand here, they might go away!

DING DONG!!

Don’t think their going away!

Raclette-The most Social way to Dine

The Raclette is a very European way of eating. We were invited to a friends house one evening, and were greeted with a table full of food, and a giant hot plate in the middle. Grant and I looked at each other and then asked... so what happens?
Basically, it is an electrical hot plate, with 6-8 mini grills underneath, and comes with mini trays to put under the grills.

You set this up in the middle of the table, and arrange the food around, meat and fish is placed on the hot plate to cook, and potatoes, vegetables, with cheese placed on top, are put into the trays and placed under the grills! It's so much fun, and leaves room for lots of chat!

The ideal ingredients-

Hot Plate -

Good steak- sliced about an inch thick
Chicken-  again, an inch thick
King Prawns
Scallops

Grill -

Bolied new potatoes - which people can take and slice themselves
Cooked carrots batons
Cooked asparagus
Cooked baby corns
Peppers

Cheese - pre sliced, and european, applewood is also scrummy

Condiments -

English Mustard
BBQ sauce
Sweet Thai Chilli sauce,
Apple sauce
Wholegrain Mustard
Tartare Sauce

Arrange everything on the table in bowls, and let your guest cook their own dinners!!!

Weekends

Aren't weekends just the greatest thing. I started mine of with my birthday. Now, if you're going to start a weekend right, then that's the way to it! Breakfast in bed, presents, music, no school run.... may I add, my weekend started friday. You need to get yourself a husband like mine, still after 15 years of marriage he amazes me. Didn't lift a finger all day.... Me, not him. He did everything. School run, picnic in the park, even walked around an array of clothes shops and waited with the little group of bored husbands, seated outside the changing rooms, as I said
"Do these look alright?"
With his phone for company, and keeping an eye on Imogen, I think his sanity levels were at an ok reading! lesson one to picnic-ing in the park.... make sure you go on a sunny day. We totally did. As I sat in the sun, and  and gushed to Grant how much I loved the sun, and how, this is the way life should be spent, a jolly fellow rode past on his Pennyfarthing!!! Now, two things worried me at this precise moment in time.
Number One- Had I gone back in time, whilst my eyes were shut and I was soaking up the rays, because if so, that was some powerful sun!
Number Two- Why did this feel normal??
I just decided to let the moment flow over me. Lifes easier that way. I was born on a hot, sunny day. This is my argument as to why I need to live in the sun. I could have stayed there all day, but there were more shops to be rooted through.
As we reach the car, Imogen is trailing behind us, sucking her fingers, and carrying a drink.... looking like the resident drunk! We will her on, she looks at us as if to say "how long are your legs, and how long are mine?"
She finally reaches the car, and flops onto the back seat, with fingers remaing in the mouth!
Tescos, we always end up at Tescos! It's a standing joke with my sister and all my cousins! Whtever we do, whever we go, we always end up wandering round Tescos! Grant and I went to a wedding once, fancy doo, dressed up to the nines, and on the way back, popped into tescos! What's the pull?
I head for the clothes dept., Grant and Imogen head for the furniture dept. where i find them laid out on the sofas! We all sit on the softest sofa ever, and deicide we should move into Tescos home. It's got everything we need, including a Costas Coffee bar!
We relunctantly leave our new home, to go pick up some of our other children. Why can't they stay in school till 5???
We decided for dinner that night, we'll have shall dine in the garden, so after Grant has put up the Gazzebo, put they long table out there, chairs are cleaned and arranged, Raclette is plugged in and plates are on the table, I wander out and a nnounce to Grant that i think it's too cold!!!  To his total credit, he gather up the plates, raclette, table tec, and put them back into the warm dining room. Gosh I'm glad I married that man!!!
So after 4 years of asking for a party, I finally get one, and it's a total surprise. He did it, he pulled it off!! I was in shock.
That's the way to start your weekend!!

Chapter 4 of School Run Mum

Once the Devil Trainer has completed her mission of almost killing us, I stand beside my bike that has just kicked my butt for the past forty five minutes, and and try to fight the urge to throw up! i hang my head over the seat and try to listen to the conversation that is going on above me! Imogen! She can be my excuse....
"Excuse me a mo ladies, got to get Midge!"
"Ok my love, meet you downstairs in the Cafe!"
"Yep!"
Short sentences are the best, when you're not too sure what is going to come out of your mouth! Luck was with me today, words were the only thing leaving my mouth! Now, for those that have done a Spin class or any gym class for that matter, you will know when I say that to overcome the fear of falling down the stairs is a major obstacle in getting to the creche, locker rooms or Exit!! I stand at the top of the stairs, look down, coach my legs on how how we are going to do this, and take that first step of faith! one step down, and I don't feel that tumbling sensation. Great, that cord is connected from my brain to my legs! Two steps, three, four.... confidence is growing, I feel I can now stand upright and bring my legs closer together! I make a dignified entrance into the reception area only to trip walking past the desk. Why, Why can't I be like those always composed Mums? You know the ones.........They are always made up, not a hair out of place, clothes are immaculate and match, they don't walk, they glide, and when they eat, it is always the perfect size to put in their lovely lip glossed mouths!
I walk a little fsater to the Creche, and smile,
"How was Imogen?"
"Great, had a play, then snuggled up to Sarah, she's fast asleep now!"
Seriously, do they not know, that now she will not sleep tonight until about three hours after her bedtime!! I smile, say "Greeeat!" and push the little door open when I hear the buzzer go. I wander down the little corridor that has windows all on one side, and a big jungle gym on the other. As I walk past these windows, I always feel like I've come to pick a child, it feels like I'm in a dog pound, and I get to see them play, before I make up my mind, which one I will take home with me. I look through thw door as I reach, glancing around for Imogen, lazy little minx is all curled up on Sarahs lap, in the midst of a mountain of cushions!! I steady myself on the gate, and grab her bag and shoes, they hand her over to me, and I almost drop her. Exercise is dangerous! I grab her in a bear hug, and say thankyou. I now realise I am stuck inside the creche, I can slowly feel my legs starting to collapse, so I shout over my shoulder
"can someone just gaet the gate for me, I forgot my hurdling shoes today!"
One of the girls comes to my rescue, and I slowly make my way up the corridor, only to be faced with another gate.... my goodness, it's easier getting out of Alcatraz, I'm sure! The receptionists clicks the buzzer, and I plough forward, taking no prisoners. ARGH, the door out is a pully one!!! I feel like I am on a game show, one more task and I win the £50 000. I almost melt under the pressure, when another Mum, who looks just as red as me, much to my pleasure, burst through the door. I make a run for it, Indiana Jones Style, make it out just before Imogens bag gets caught in the door!
Da Da, I feel I should be clapped as I walk back through the reception over to the cafe! Do these people not appreciate, what I just had to go through, to make it to my lunch.... and to top it all off... no £50 000!
I wander over to the table where Tan, Kelly and Lauren are. by this time, Imogen is awake, and has noticed Bella. Cool, those two will play and I can chat. I go and buy a healthy lunch ( sneaking a Starbucks Hot Chocolate in ) and set it on the table. I love to lunch. I am a lunching lady. No this isn't Lunching Annonymus, but I could easily do it proffessionally. I sink into the cosy chairs, and join the conversation. Clothes, oh goodie, my favourite subject, teamed with Shoes! Lauren has a party to go to, and we are all deciding what she should wear. An imaginary wardrobe suddenly pops up. In Five minutes, she's suited and booted and onto another subject. Its amazing the number of subjects a group of women can cover in an hour. We spoken about the party, teachers, school, food, resturants, cars, interior design, troubles, gym, husbands, children, some "other stuff". the list goes on. Once we've put the world to rights, we stand up, grab bags and children, hug, and kiss, and say
"see you in a couple of hours!"
We are still talking as we all reach our cars. I am first in, and toot my horn as I drive past. With Music up loud, and me and Imogen, singing louder, we make our way home. The car starts to judder. Noooooooo.

Oh my!! yesterday ended up with me laughing so hard! the School Run turned into a drive by dropping off. Imogen doesn't start playschool until 9:15, but Elliot and Siennas doors open at 8:50 and shut at nine. Now, with normal families you'd turn up at just before 9am, loving give your kids a hug and kiss goodbye, look at your preschool child and smile while saying, shall we wander over to playschool now sweetheart! Oh, I forgot to mention the playschool is next door to the school! This was my normal until I was sitting in the playschool waiting room, willing the slowly ticking 25 ticking minutes to go faster! Not only am i waiting almost half an hour to start with a room of excited pre school children and other Mums who really just want to do the School Run in 5 minutes and not have to drag it out all day, there is a woman who is there every morning. She has turned the preschool waiting room into a doctors waiting room. I am normally the first to arrive, an empty waiting room noramlly awaits me. Then a couple of of chatty mums will wander in. I have my ones I really like to talk to, There are some lovely people in this area. As we chat, you an hear the woman coming, that hacking, stomach churning cough, the shuffling of the feet, and then...... WAYNEEE!!
Its's like those old western movies when the bad guys come to the swinging doors of the bar, and the camera cuts to everybodys eyes looking at each other. That's us, even the kids go silent. If I have a headache, i generally wait in the car, the voice is too much, it the best way to describe it is a high pitched, raspey,clipped shout. There is no volume control.
Wasn't feeling to good, so I sat quietly while Imogen played on my phone, making pies! i left it later yesterday to do the school run, a little experiment. i could say that, or being honest, I didn't realise the time! So, at 8:55, with the younger three in the car, i pulled out of my drive into traffic! Got to the school which is a five minute walk, ( how lazy am I )  at 8:58, two minutes before doors shut. The whole journey all Elliot repeated was " Are we going to be late?"  We arrived at school, where i proceeded to park up the kerb in front of the school, flew the doors open, and very nearly threw the kids over the road! All the while Elliot and Sienna now asking if they are late, I shout to them as they are running of "have a good day, Love you". Whether they heard or not, will remain a mystery. Getting back in the car, I see the little person I have left, one more to give to the educational system, then I am free!!!  I park a tad more sensibly, then wander over to the playschool. Imogen carrying her rucksack, that covers half of her tiny frame, and her lunchbox, looks up at me and says....." you're gorgeous!" I turn to look at her, this little, tiny, perfect face smiling up at me. I sweep her up into my arms, all the while she's giggling, and I kiss her, and tell her..."and you're beautiful!"
What a way to start the day! The day itself was uneventful, I'm ill. Not much to write about when you're ill, well, nothing that won't just depress people! haha
The way my day ended was by Eden falling on her bum in a Kickboxing class! I almost couldn't drive home I was laughing so much! Perfect way to end a day, a bit of comedic falling!

Sunday Bliss

Woke up to beautiful, clear blue skies, the sunshine and my three year old Imogen singing songs at the top of her voice, from the movie Mamma Mia! what a way to wake up i thought. As a slow, lazy smile crept over my face, a flying object catapulted itself from the bedroom door to our bed! I realised the object had been named six years previously. It was a one in a million design, had an infectious giggle and went by the name of Sienna! I lay in bed, wondering if in fact it was a bed we had bought, or a trampoline for the kids. Once the bouncing was done, and she was happy Grant and i were awake, she sweetly asks...."May i play on your phone Mummy!" i notice it is already in her hand before she's even finished the question. i'm sure the kids think it's a games console rather than my phone and personal diary, which i must say, i could not live without. I was one of these people that thought pen and paper were good enough. Grant has talked me round! If I don't have my phone, things don't get done!
Family came to visit, i see this as a big catch up session! Kids in the garden and pure uninterrupted adult talk. thats a treat for me! Church in the afternoon, then back home for dinner and family time
As I call  the kids to the kitchen for the warm, moist chocolate cake I've just baked, chloe announces that seats are to be taken in the living room. Grant, Eden and i obediently take a sofa each and wait for the show to begin! A FASHION SHOW!!!!!  Well worth putting the cake on hold! Chloe stands upright at the door and speaks in a chelsea accent......Imogen is sporting the new princess look about town!....in sweeps Imogen, dressed from head to toe in pink, princess dress, clip cloppy shoes, tiara, bracelets, necklass, and so on. Sienna, the same. Then she announces Gabe who looks pretty cool in his shades, he comes running in, and slides on his knees with his hands in the air! Very Rock and Roll. Elliot was the grand finale, and what a mouth dropping finale he was..... he walked in wearing a cheerleader outfit and a bandana!!!!! "Son, what are you wearing?" To make Grant and i know for sure that we need to find a therapist asap, Gabe comes back in dressed as Hannah Montana!!!! Maybe i shouldn't have painted their toenails when they were younger to annoy Grant!!!