Monday 9 May 2011

Chapter 5 of School Run Mum

Chapter 5


“Seriously, I’m at a roundabout! Not now, Not now! Stupid car…. Not really, I love you, I love you, please work!”

This is my normal pep talk to the car when it feels like giving up and laying its weary wheels down to rest. I was told that my car normally gives up after about five years….. Almost eight years later, new wheels, 2 new batteries, a big hole in the water bottle, and bringing back to life countless times, it’s still with us…..no doubt grudgingly, but non the less, with us! My gratitude towards the car varies depending on it’s performance. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions driving my car. Upon first entering the family taxi, I am filled with hope, faith and anxiety, then pure elation if it starts, or pure ARGH if it doesn’t. Anyone that has taken a lovely car ride, with the music on, windows down, and the car responding to the tiny wish you have will know that feeling of contentment. Well, that’s the complete opposite to the journey you get in my car. As soon as we pull out of the drive, the adrenalin is pumping,
“Will I make it today?”
“Have I got my phone to call Grant to come pick me up from where ever the car has decided the journey has now ended?”
“Did I put the buggy in, I don’t really want to carry Imogen all the way home!”
“Is there water in it?”
“Is there oil in it?”
“Is there life in it?”

All good questions, for a car like mine. Bless it, it gets us round, but only on it’s own terms.  Once it decided to give up just outside a Petrol station. Wouldn’t even give me just a little more to get it into the station! I parked it on the side of the road, got out and kicked the wheel! Like that would make it work, but I felt a whole lot better. That afternoon, once I had bought a can of petrol and refilled a completely empty tank (opps) I was talking to my neighbour, who casually asked, did I get the car working? I looked at her a little puzzled how she new.
“Oh, I drove past while you were giving it a good kicking!”
Number 1 - why didn’t she stop to help??
Number 2 - how totally embarrassing!!

So, as I’m approaching the roundabout, the car is approaching either a heart attack or a strop!! Either one is not going to go down to well with the other drivers behind me. I decide to just close my eyes and put my foot down. Let me just back up there, I didn’t actually close my eyes. That would not adhere to the Laws of the road! So with my eyes wide open, I see a space and almost put my foot through the floor.
“Woaaaah!” Imogen’s thrill seeking side comes out in her.
“Yeaaaah” She loves going round a roundabout, especially at 40 miles an hour I’ve just found out. I’m laughing at her so much, I almost miss our exit. A quick glance, a flick of the indicator, and look over my shoulder and I pull over just in time!! I can hear the crowds cheering in my head. I’m totally trying out for the Grand Prix next year. Lewis Hamilton will be crying in his little pit stop.
As I take my foot off the break, and rest it back down on the floor, I feel an odd shape under my foot, as I search for what it is, I notice that whilst performing my Formula one crowd pleaser, an array of rubbish was flung from under my chair. Ewww, I have actually put my foot on a half eaten banana! Right, family council when the kids get home.

As I praise the car for making it round the massive hill in the middle of the road, I realise it’s not finished yet. I notice from the gauge it is starting to overheat, I only filled it up last night! My Car is a Lush!! I coach it all the way home, and as I pull into the drive, I sit there and let the thumping in my heart calm down. This can’t be good for my nerves. As I sit there a little voice drifts over my shoulder
“Get out Mumma?”
My little passenger has a big smile on her face when I turn around
“Was that fun?”
“Round again!”
No! Definitely not, we’re home, the car made it, I don’t have to phone Grant to tell him where I’ve left the car, and Dora the Explorer is on, which means I get an hour, to do the rest of the chores, without having a constant shadow!

I flop out of the car, and open the car door to get Imogen out. She always has a smile on her face! She puts her hands to me and I wave.
“No, out!”
I knew what she meant, just teasing. My goodness, I’m bad.
I get her out of the car, and pull her up to my eye level.
“How much do I love you?”
“ To a moon and back!”
This is my thing I have with the kids. I think every parent should have their own little thing. Mine is to ask
“How much do I love you?”
the kids reply
“To the moon and back!”
I love it. As I say prayers with them at night, I kiss them and say it. The boys will always say it again when I reach the top of the stairs! Ahhh. It’s melts my heart. I know I’m on limited time with that one, so I enjoy every second.

We walk up the stairs to the house and open the door.
“DORA!”
We walk into the TV room and I place Imogen back into the castle she had built before we left. Command Dora to come on with the magic of the remote control, and leave her to complete the tasks for the day. I think they have to help Isa find her home. The things a 5 year old kid goes through just to help her friends. Through the dark forest, across the river in a boat, try to pass the grumpy troll. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for kids doing things for themselves, but I am a tad concerned that Dora’s parents let her wander through forests, fields, and mountains, on her own, and without packing her a lunch!! Am I the only one seeing something wrong with this picture?
I leave Dora and Imogen to wander through forests, fields and mountains ( if Dora’s parents can do it, then so can I!!” )
Right, 2 hours before this house becomes a hive of activity again. What to do? I end up in the study, browsing the DVDs! I’ll have a shower, then pop a movie on while I do some paperwork. Perfect. My fingers flow over the plastic covers and finally stop at The Notebook! I love this film. I love Noah.
I peep round the corner of the TV room, and check that Imogen is accomplishing her to do list with Dora. All fine and dandy. I was informed that Swiper had in fact turned up, but he’s been dealt with. 2 years old and dealing with thieving foxes already, couldn’t be more proud.
I stand at the bottom of the stairs, look upwards, and put the first foot forward on the 16 step journey that will take me to my bedroom.
“16, divided by two, is 8, that’s only eight steps to my bedroom, I’m doing it!”
I run up the stairs two at a time, and actually surprise myself when I don’t fall back down at the top. I must still have adrenalin racing through my body from the car journey!!
I walk into my bedroom, and throw the DVD on my bed, then make my way to the en-suite. I put the shower on before I get in, to get it to the perfect temperature. I don’t want to put myself through the torture, of being pelted with freezing cold water, then scolding hot. Not really my idea of fun. The redness that had covered my face during Spin class, has finally started to fade away, and I just have that healthy glow. Haha. Healthy glow. Whatever, I was close to throwing up. I’m not sure that if you looked Healthy up in the dictionary, that you would find ‘Being sick’ in big, bold letters written underneath!!. I might be wrong, but I’m willing to put myself out there! Once I see the steam gently rising from the shower, I slid in and let it rain down on me. Nothing like a shower after the gym.

DING DONG!!

If I stand here, they might go away!

DING DONG!!

Don’t think their going away!

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